Forgiveness and the Meaning of Christmas

The Christmas season is upon us, bringing with it themes of hope, love, and joy. Traditionally, it is the time of gift-giving, generosity, and goodwill. In the Jewish tradition, Hanukkah symbolizes the theme of light overcoming darkness. Kwanzaa is about building relationships with a call for unity and forgiveness to help the community prosper. The core belief in the Christian tradition is that the birth of Jesus would lead to his sacrifice, atoning for human sin. This divine act of grace and mercy is considered the greatest gift ever given, and because of the gift of forgiveness, Christians are taught to extend the same grace and compassion to others. The Christmas season reflects a time to release grudges, heal old wounds, and forgive — especially family members, friends, and neighbors. This is mirrored in the proclamation of “peace on earth, goodwill towards men,” which we often hear during this time and is tied to the idea of mending broken relationships and fostering goodwill, made possible through the power of forgiveness.

Unconditional Love and Goodwill

For many, Christmas is the celebration of the birth of an incredible being who embodies the energy of unconditional love, goodwill toward others, and caring for those who are less fortunate. It brings in a higher state of consciousness. This spiritual concept refers to a state of divine awareness attainable by anyone. It is the realization of one’s divine nature, leading to the outward demonstration of qualities such as love, joy, and compassion. It is an awareness that moves beyond ego and reactivity, often achieved through spiritual practice and spiritual and emotional maturity. The key element is understanding the limits of the ego and transcending it, which opens the door to a more peaceful and loving state of being.

Forgiveness is at the heart of the Christmas season, and there are people doing the work of forgiveness with underserved or overlooked populations. We have met some of these people during season 1 of our podcast. Our season finale features three people doing incredible work, giving workshops to people experiencing domestic violence, living in prisons, or dealing with the aftermath of war. Forgiveness begins with the individual, which means all of us can contribute to healing our society and lay the foundation for a culture of forgiveness that leads to societal change.

Practicing Forgiveness

All of us can practice forgiveness this holiday season by mending broken relationships and letting go of grudges. In forgiving others, recognize that people who hurt others may have been hurt themselves, making it easier to extend compassion and see them in a more forgiving light. And don’t forget to seek forgiveness for yourself. This is the time for self-reflection — to acknowledge actions you may regret and the harm it may have caused others. Have the courage to apologize to others if need be; it will help you feel better. Self-forgiveness also means having compassion for yourself. Being human means being imperfect, making mistakes, and accepting our vulnerabilities. It happens to all of us. We can’t change the past, but we can create a different future. And don’t forget, during these hectic and stressful times, thoughtful acts of kindness can go a long way.

Stories From Forgiveness Trainers

In this month’s episode of Political Forgiveness: Voices of Peace you’ll hear stories from Leocadia Montero-Hainley, a psychotherapist and consultant specializing in conflict resolution and trauma processing; Rodney Peterson, executive director of the Boston Theological Schools in the Greater Boston area; and Dan Carmen, director of Cooperative Metropolitan Ministries, which is Boston’s oldest interfaith social action network. All three have given training programs in forgiveness.

Leocadia began her career as a prosecutor, hoping her work would change people’s lives. She didn’t see much behavioral change, so she left that field to study human behavior. As part of her internship program at Adelante Mujeres, a nonprofit organization that focuses on the needs of marginalized immigrant Latina women, Leocadia became involved with the ESPERE (Schools of Forgiveness) forgiveness training program, where she began working with survivors of domestic violence. It was here that she experienced the transformative power of forgiveness.

Rodney’s interest in forgiveness began when he attended the Harvard Conference on Forgiveness and Reconciliation, which featured Desmond Tutu and his reflections on apartheid. That gave Rodney courage to teach forgiveness and reconciliation in his classes at the Boston University School of Theology. He began giving workshops around the world, looking at conflict and religion. When Rodney made it to Bosnia, he met with religious clerics and tried to have a conversation about the war when one of the clerics turned to Rodney and said, “All that we are really interested in is for someone to say, ‘I’m sorry.’ ” That was a striking moment Rodney will never forget, which spoke to the importance of forgiveness.

Dan grew up in the Washington, DC area and was schooled in Fairfax County, where the population was very diverse. There was gang violence in his school. It was a hard place to navigate, especially at a young age. Dan learned how to fight in his own defense, getting his basic training from M13. He was trusted by this gang and learned how to mediate between them and other gangs. As Dan’s interest in mediation grew, he began to study different forms of conflict resolution, which ultimately led him to study forgiveness and reconciliation and to the ESPERE program.

Season 2: Seeking Podcast Guests With Forgiveness Stories or Coaching Potential

This is the end of season 1 of Political Forgiveness: Voices of Peace. I want to thank all of my wonderful guests who made this season possible. There is a lot to learn from all of them, and I am so grateful. Season 2 will begin in the spring of 2026, and I have a fabulous co-host joining me: Dr. Frederic Luskin, who was my first guest this season. Season 1 covered the broad picture of political forgiveness. Season 2 will focus on how we build the foundation of political forgiveness, which begins with the individual, and will focus on individual forgiveness.

If you know of anyone with a forgiveness story, or you yourself have personally been able to forgive, or have struggled with any aspect of forgiveness, and are interested in possibly being coached on the podcast, please get in touch with me. Fred and I are looking for anyone who struggles to forgive their exes, spouses, adult children, parents, family members, friends, bosses, etc. I can be reached at erborris@gmail.com. Looking forward to hearing from you. Happy holidays!