Many countries around the world are grappling with a violent past. In the peacebuilding world, addressing the past focuses on identifying and resolving the root causes of conflict through constructive engagement with narratives and past experiences of violent conflict. Many leaders are, or have been at the forefront of building the foundations of peace within their societies and nations. Leaders who come to mind are Nelson Mandela, Martin Luther King Jr., and Mahatma Gandhi. All of these men followed their moral compass, based on principles of inner strength and ethical convictions. Can we develop leaders who possess a mindset of inclusivity and moral fortitude? Is there something we can learn from leaders who have been self-reflective due to their experiences, and as a result, can teach us very valuable lessons? And is there a place for neuroscience to help us gain a deeper understanding of one another?
Tim Phillips, founder and CEO of Beyond Conflict, a nonprofit organization that works with leaders to address conflict and promote social change in the United States and abroad, has shared insights gained from his work with leaders around the world. In my latest podcast, Biology, Brains, and the Business of Forgiveness, I had the honor of discussing with Tim how these insights can inform the work of political forgiveness. He began meeting leaders towards the end of the Cold War, especially those in newly emerging democracies. When speaking to these leaders, various issues started to emerge, — including the legacy of the past. How do individuals, communities, and nations deal with the burden of repression that lasted for generations? How do we trust again?
Acknowledging the Oppressor’s Experience
Tim had the privilege of becoming friends with Roelf Meyer, a South African leader and the chief negotiator for the National Party government, who played an integral role in the negotiations between F.W. de Klerk and Nelson Mandela that led to South Africa’s transition to post-apartheid governance. Meyer was asked if he felt any anxiety or insecurity about the decision he made with de Klerk about the negotiations that ended apartheid, and how he felt afterwards. Meyer did question whether he was doing the right thing for his people and for the nation, understanding that people feared what lay on the other side of change. Yet, the moment the agreement was signed, Meyer felt a sense of liberation. A paradigm shift occurred.
Tim then asked more about Meyer’s community, the Boer or Afrikaner community, which went through a form of ethnic cleansing and genocide by the British in the early 20th century. Twenty thousand men, women, and children were killed. Did Meyer’s community ever confront that? Meyer paused, and as he thought about this more, he said if his community had an internal process of healing and truth-telling, perhaps after the Boer War, they may not have set up apartheid.
As part of the truth-telling and healing process, hearing the stories of the victims gives a voice to the voiceless and creates a historical record of what took place. It sheds light on what has happened. But what about the story of the oppressor — were they once victims, too? What if a truth-telling process included the acknowledgment of the psychological landscape of the oppressor that created the situation of so much suffering in the first place? It’s much more challenging to acknowledge the trauma of individuals who did horrible things to you, and to acknowledge what wounded them. Acknowledgment is a crucial component of the political forgiveness process and is essential to breaking cycles of violence, as reflected in Meyer’s insight, and could have profound implications. And we need a process that invites those who cause harm to engage in a healing process of their own, thereby reclaiming their humanity as well. Political forgiveness provides for that opportunity.
Political Forgiveness Begins at Home
Political forgiveness must begin with the individual, and only then can it radiate out to the community and society at large. Phillips highlighted this when hearing someone ask Desmond Tutu about forgiveness. Tutu admitted how difficult forgiveness can be, sharing that when he was in a fight with his wife, he sometimes struggled to say he was sorry. When we think of political forgiveness, we often consider it in broad, existential terms, particularly when we witness the immense suffering that occurs in the world. But political forgiveness begins with our lived human experiences, within our families, our friends, and in our communities. It is part of being human, and to understand our humanness, Phillips began to look to brain and behavioral science to gain insight into this.
The Neural Signature of Forgiveness
Most people don’t realize that our every thought has a chemical component transmitted via neurotransmitters in our brains. Neuroscientists tell us that thoughts can change our brain chemistry as well as our physiology. Neuroplasticity — our brain’s ability to alter neural connections — allows the brain to compensate for traumatic events by forming new neural connections based on new experiences. This can create a cognitive shift in our thinking, leading to a reappraisal of our emotions.
In 2013, a group of scientists (Ricciardi et al.) studied how our brains heal emotional wounds, and they found that the decision to forgive rewires the brain. Neural pathways associated with anger and resentment are weakened, while new neural pathways related to emotional reappraisal, taking perspective and empathy are created. Those who chose to forgive horrific things have also changed their neural signature, which releases the PTSD patterning through emotional reappraisal, which then reduces post-traumatic stress. The difference is actually visible on an fMRI.
The Neuropsychological Equivalent of Grace
What can we take from this? When we can forgive, we perceive the world with greater clarity and insight. The rewiring of the brain has enabled an emotional reappraisal, increased ability for perspective-taking, enhanced empathy, and the healing of emotional wounds. This helps in viewing the oppressor in a new light and within a broader context, where one’s defenses are lowered, allowing for a deeper understanding of the situation as a whole, because our brains have changed. Perhaps this also gives us a window into spiritual experiences. This window is the gift of forgiveness. Forgiveness changes the neural imprint in our brains where an emotional reappraisal happens. This creates a release, which some experience as liberation, while for others, it feels like a shift in perception that is a miracle. From a neuroscientific perspective, perhaps this is the true meaning of grace.
To learn more about Tim Phillips’ work, enjoy the Political Forgiveness episode, “Biology, Brains, and the Business of Forgiveness” on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, YouTube, or wherever you get your podcasts.
SOURCE:
Ricciardi et al, How the Brain Heals Emotional Wounds: The Functional Neuroanatomy of Forgiveness, Frontiers in Human Neuroscience, Dec. 9, 2013
